A pertinent problem in today’s world is shaming and negative criticism and automatic moral policing, which a section of the population takes upon itself to inflict on a minority or an individual when that individual fails to comply with and conform to the ideas and beliefs of the shamers. However, it might not always be the majority shaming the non-majority. Sad circumstances have led to women turning on women, and in most cases, it is seen that women end up shaming their fellow women without even realizing they are doing it.
Not only is this anti-conducive to a progressive society, but it is also another form of oppression, whereby women end up putting down other women. This is in conformation with the patriarchal structure of the society and is a blow to feminism, which is the fight against the predominance of men in society. Although it may sound simple, it is very important for women to stand with each other instead of finding ways to bring each other down. Here are various types of shaming you’re probably doing knowingly or unknowingly.
Types of Shaming Behavior You’re Probably Doing Knowingly or Unknowingly
Fat shaming is the act of poking fun at someone for being overweight or telling someone they are worthless, useless, lazy, or disgusting because they are overweight. it means ” to make an overweight female feel in any way uncomfortable, usually by telling her anything is wrong with her weight.” This, unfortunately, includes Doctors telling them to lose weight for their health and suggesting diets or friends saying that their clothes are too tight, even men very politely refusing dates because they just don’t find them attractive.
Nature has created so many body types, it’s unrealistic to expect us all to look the same. It’s an often overlooked reality that thinner people also get shamed for being “too skinny,” “body obsessed,” “looking anorexic.” Just like everyone else, these people are entitled to be free from the judgment of others when it comes to how their body functions and what it needs. This is the exact opposite of fat shaming but it has the same ugly results. This is more directed towards women, as with fat shaming, but men get the negative connotations of being skinny as well. For men, it is more a masculine thing though. If you are rail thin it is almost like you are considered feminine in ways.
Often, members of the LGBT community takes cues from heteronormative ideas and behavior. This includes toxic concepts about masculinity, which can easily lead to femme shaming. You may think it’s funny to disparage someone for looking, sounding, or acting femme, but really, what’s wrong with being femme? Jokes like this are often a way of asserting authority or power, which is pretty horrifying when you consider femmes experience higher rates of violence.
It isn’t your job to shame a fellow woman because she chooses not to take the same attitude regarding sex. To some women, sex is just sex. It doesn’t matter if she enjoys having sex with multiple men, different men, often, casually, kinky, etc. It doesn’t matter. No one should care how many people a woman is having sex with.
Women slut-shaming other women only makes it okay for men to slut shame women. Let’s make one thing clear. Sex is awesome. Sex is natural. Women desire sex. Sex does not define you. Sex is calming and therapeutic. We should not be worried about the number of partners our fellow women have had but if they are happy, healthy, and safe.
Our Community deals with a high rate of addiction. Addiction is a real struggle for a lot of people, and shaming others for their battles with addiction is harmful, cruel and incredibly unhelpful. If someone you know is dealing with addiction, work on ways you can support them. There is undoubtedly more we all could be doing to improve awareness about addiction and access to addiction treatment.
Bisexual people are not just looking for the best of both worlds. Gay people are not trying to convert you. Queer people are not confused or coming out because it’s trendy. You can’t turn a lesbian, straight. There is no need to shame a person for the identity by repeating any of these misconceptions.
Have you ever heard: “Oh my god, you’re 40? You look so good for your age!” I’m sure you have… Sentences like that are thrown around freely all the time. However, what most people don’t realize is that that’s age shaming. Why does being of a certain age mean that you can’t look nice? Since a very young age, we’re taught that aging is something to avoid at all cost, like a disease or something. I’ve heard stories of women at the prime time of their youth, worrying about little wrinkles here and there and even considering going through a bunch of crazy treatments to prevent them. Which is not bad – I might add – Everyone has the right to do whatever they feel like to their body, but I think it’s kinda sad that we’re worrying about it THAT much.
It’s time to change the perception of other people towards aging women- cause weirdly, when men age, they’re viewed as sexy and sophisticated. We’re all gonna age at some point. It’s natural and beautiful. And actually, it’s a privilege. Sometimes we forget that not everyone has the chance to grow old. In this society, not many people take the time to appreciate the beauty of time on a woman’s face, we’re accustomed to seeing everyone all polished and smooth AF.